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Question: Even though my wife and I have been married for thirty years, my ejaculation has gradually got quicker and quicker over the years to the point now where I cannot think of myself as anything other than a premature ejaculator! I have had a vasectomy, but apart from that, nothing has changed. Is there any evidence to suggest premature ejaculation is correlated with getting older? And how do I stop it? Answer 1: No, but there is evidence that premature ejaculation is correlated with dropping testosterone levels, which are correlated with age. Men need a good level of testosterone at all ages to perform sexually - and without testosterone, the sexual responses that you have established over thirty years of sex will change completely. My advice is - see a good andrologist or endocrinologist and press for testosterone replacement therapy. Answer 2: Try condoms with a local anesthetic inside them. This will certainly slow you down considerably, in fact they should allow you to go on for as long as your wife requires, or until you and she both wish to come. Answer 3: You need to vary what you are doing during sex. Sticking to one position, one thrusting movement, and one attitude won't work. Start with a little oral sex or masturbation, massage each other's bodies, change positions frequently from man on top to woman on top, and so on. Variation is great in combating premature ejaculation because every time you stop the proceedings, you allow your arousal to drop a little. Then, when you start again, you take a little more time to get back to the level of arousal you were at. In this way you can go for a long time, and when you do come, the added benefit will be that your orgasm is much more intense. Answer 4: To last longer before I come during lovemaking, I discovered it's really helpful to work up to sex really slowly. I take my time in foreplay, I take my time in ensuring that my partner has an orgasm, and I take my time in penetration. I don't thrust hard or fast, just leisurely, and slow, and I breathe really deeply and long. All of this means that I am relaxed, and I think that helps because I believe premature ejaculation has a lot to do with being tense and uptight. My orgasm is intense, too, when it comes, I think because I have taken the time to build up to it. What this means is that I last a long time and my partner has several orgasms before I have one. Another benefit here is that this takes the pressure off me - I don't feel I have to go on for ages to satisfy her. Answer 5: Even though my husband and I have been together ten years, we are still searching for a good way to stop his premature ejaculation. But what we do to get around it is to work up to penetration real slow. He takes ages eating my pussy, and I give him the best head. We massage and kiss and simply spend time staring into each other's eyes before the main event. As you can imagine, after an hour or two of this, I am so ready for it that I come almost immediately when he puts his penis in me. Sure, my orgasm triggers his, but the point is that I am so hot that I can come whether he lasts two minutes or twenty. It's not ideal but it helps a lot. Answer 6: Some guys have suggested you masturbate before you have sex. But I am not sure that's the best way to stop premature ejaculation. Surely you lose some of your passion and have a hard time getting back to the same level of arousal? And if you're getting older, you may not even be able to get it up twice in one day! Here are some other suggestions from the internet on how to deal with premature ejaculation. They take about three to six weeks to work.
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