Stop Premature Ejaculation Now! 
"How to cure premature ejaculation"

One way to avoid ejaculating too quickly - a self-help cure for premature ejaculation!

In essence: have sex without ejaculating, stop, continue with sex until you approach orgasm once again - then relax once more. Repeat this several times then finally allow yourself to ejaculate.

Once you have developed the ability to identify the moment immediately before you come, i.e. before you ejaculate, then you are beginning to develop some level of self-control. It's always possible to stop thrusting and remain still inside your partner for some time during sex. This will allow your level of arousal to drop until you are no longer likely to ejaculate. Once you feel you have regained control, you can begin to thrust again - then, when your arousal begins to increase once more, you can last for a little longer until you feel yourself to be on the verge of ejaculation. 

Developing self-control like this requires some self-discipline, so that the temptation to simply continue thrusting until you ejaculate does not overcome you. Thus the first step in developing control over premature ejaculation is to mentally change your attitude so that you believe that you do indeed have the ability to control how quickly or prematurely you ejaculate.

Treating premature ejaculation: the first step

You can start to develop control by learning how near you are to ejaculation as you masturbate. Most premature ejaculators are not at all aware of how near they are to ejaculation until it is right on them and they are beginning to pump semen into their partner!

When your penis is erect, start to masturbate - preferably with lube like a soothing massage oil - but do it slowly and in a relaxed way. Often men masturbate quickly and ejaculate as soon as possible: the object of the exercise here is to develop more control over the speed with which you reach orgasm, so masturbating quickly to orgasm is not the correct method for this premature ejaculation treatment.

For this treatment to be effective, you must resist the desire to simply continue masturbating when you begin to sense your orgasm approaching. The whole point is to increase your self-control and self-awareness, and the best way to do that is to develop control over your ejaculation while you masturbate. If you wish to actively control your ejaculation, as opposed to just stopping self-stimulation and letting your arousal drop, so that you do not actually ejaculate, you can actually squeeze your penis just below the glans between your finger and thumb - or you can get your partner to do it for you (see below). Be warned, though: this is not especially pleasant, and simply exercising some self-control can be a better route to learning how not to ejaculate before you wish to do so! What's more, you can't have sex while you are training until step 5 - see below for more details.

After you sense that the moment of incipient ejaculation (also known as the point of no return) has passed, you can start to masturbate again.

Once again, continue to masturbate until you feel that your orgasm is approaching. Then stop, wait for your arousal to drop, perhaps even for your erection to disappear, before you continue to masturbate. For the first four cycles of this method, don't ejaculate. On the fifth, continue masturbating until you ejaculate, but remember that the longer you can go without ejaculating, the more effective the treatment will be. This means that prolonged masturbation, where you keep yourself just below the point of ejaculation, can be especially helpful.

Repeat this procedure 3 times a week for 2 weeks.

Premature ejaculation control: the second step

It doesn't actually take long before you become much more sensitive to the point at which you're going to ejaculate. After a few sessions of masturbation, you should start to feel much more aware of the signs that precede an ejaculation: tightening of muscles in your legs and groin, a particular sensation in your testicles (balls) as they tighten up; a tingling sensation in your penis - whatever the clues are before you ejaculate, focus on them until you have a good sense of how near to ejaculation you are.

Each time you feel yourself approaching your orgasm and ejaculation, stop what you are doing and wait until you feel confident that your arousal has dropped before you start again. You will soon find that you can keep yourself on the verge of ejaculation for longer and longer periods: and, as an incentive to do so, you'll also find that when you finally do come, the orgasm and ejaculation you experience will be more powerful than before because you are ejaculating larger quantities of semen.

Practice this procedure three times a week, preferably with your partner's help.

Premature ejaculation control: the third step

Many men find that when they train their PC muscles to contract harder during orgasm, they actually discover they have greater control over their ejaculation and it feels more intense as well. I should emphasize that this is not about clamping these muscles down in the moments before you ejaculate so that no semen escapes: I believe this is pretty much impossible - and even if you can develop muscles strong enough to do it, the pleasure of your orgasm is much reduced.

Your PC muscles can be trained with "Kegel exercises for men" (you can research this on the internet); you can identify them fairly easily by twitching your penis when it's erect. That's the effect of the PC muscles, which are also partly responsible for the power of your ejaculation. If you train them up with muscle contraction routines, you will shoot your ejaculate further and have much more powerful orgasms.

Premature ejaculation control: the fourth step

Use a slippery lube in your hand to mirror the environment inside the vagina as you masturbate.

Premature ejaculation control: the fifth step

Next, you're actually going to put your penis back inside the vagina: but no hip thrusting is allowed as it tends to make men come more quickly, so it's woman on top sex! Lie on your back and have your partner climb on you and gently insert your penis into her vagina. If you feel you're going to come, get her to lift off you and pause, then repeat the insertion until you can take this without ejaculating. Practice makes perfect, and it is only a matter of time before penetration stops being so arousing that you can't help but shoot when you enter her!

If you have more control, then you will be able to get inside her before you come, and she may perhaps even make a few thrusts before you ejaculate. This is where the training in steps 1 to 4 above comes into its own. When you feel the onset of your impending ejaculation, you can stop moving, wait until your arousal has decreased, and then start have your partner start thrusting or moving gently. You can control your arousal by pausing, having her remain still, or even asking her to get off you completely. The important thing is that you identify when you are about to ejaculate and take some action to stop it happening!

You do this by focusing on what you are feeling, not on the excitement of the situation or how aroused you are. Simply concentrate on what you are feeling, wherever you identify the signs of your approaching ejaculation - be it in your testicles, penis or body muscles, and when you know it's going to happen, stop moving until your arousal has dropped again.

You can repeat this process as often as necessary until you have developed greater control. You will find that the best sex positions for learning ejaculation control are the side by side positions, in which most men can last considerably longer before they come, or (as described above) the woman on top position. Positions where you receive most stimulation - such as rear entry of man on top - are least helpful for premature ejaculators.

If you do happen to ejaculate too soon, don't worry about it. Just try harder next time, and stop thrusting or moving sooner: this way you will develop greater ejaculation control more quickly.

This self-help treatment works, though it is explained in much more detail in the full website, which you can access from the link to the right of this page. There are many other things you can do to help yourself as well when you wish to control or treat premature ejaculation effectively.

Be aroused in both mind and body. If you're not very aroused, in your mind and in your mental attitude, the paradox is that you may not last as long in bed as you would if you had a high level of arousal. Arousal can be both mental and physical - the sign of physical arousal is an erection; the sign of mental arousal is desire, lustfulness and an urge to have sex and ejaculate. It's really the latter that is the problem for premature ejaculators - you need to control mental arousal until you don't ejaculate at the sight or feel of a vagina! The best way to do this is to get fully into the complete sexual experience, mind and body, and to focus on what you are feeling rather than what you are thinking.

Be a sex expert! Get some skills in lovemaking. We're not born to be good lovers - we have to learn what our partner wants, how to give it to her, and how to pleasure ourselves. All of that's a tall order if you don't have a bit of help along the way. There are many websites which can guide you to greater ejaculation control, and there are many books, some of which I have used myself and therefore recommend from personal experience of learning to control my own premature ejaculation. See, for example: Extended Sexual Orgasm by Alan and Donna Brauer and A Beginner's Guide to Tantric Sexuality by Richard Craze.

Later on this website I explain how I achieved simultaneous orgasms with my partner during sex - although that came after I had controlled tendency to premature ejaculation!